Thursday, November 29, 2007

All I want for Christmas is

I have a Ruger SR9 or a Taurus PT1911 on my Christmas list but this is what I really want. I wonder what the wife will think? It's just a little more than a year of Thing1's tuition...

Monday, November 26, 2007

GI Jill

What does the following have in common?
    Miss America 2008 contestant
    Combat Medic
    Summa Cum Laude graduate
    Registered Nurse
    Marathoner
    Utah National Guard member
It's a simple answer. They can all be used to describe the same person. Jill Stevens, aka Miss Utah, aka Sgt. Jill Stevens. More at the North Shore Journal.

via Blackfive

TwinkeClaus

The fall project of one of my co-workers

twinkleclaus.com

Sunday, November 25, 2007

A Hillary Fan

Update - included the link
From Polipundit

    A grade school teacher in upstate New York asked her class how many of them are ‘Hillary fans’.

    Not really knowing what a Hillary fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raised their hands except one boy.

    The teacher asked Johnny why he has decided to be different. Johnny says, “I’m not a Hillary fan.”

    The teacher says, “Why aren’t you a Hillary fan?”

    Johnny says, “I’m a George Bush fan.”

    The teacher asks why he’s a George Bush fan.

    The boy says, “Well, my mom’s a George Bush fan and my dad’s a George Bush fan, so I’m a George Bush fan!”

    The teacher asks, “If your mom was a moron and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?”

    So Johnny replies, “That would make me a Hillary fan.”

Confidence Inspiring

Not!

Went online to order some tickets for a local performance of the Nutcracker. Instead I get:

    Exception Occured. System.Data.SqlClient.SqlException: The log file for database 'unity' is full. Back up the transaction log for the database to free up some log space.


Nice error handling.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Giving Thanks

It's something that everyone tends to do at this time of the year. For one day a year Americans pause to give thanks for all that we are blessed with. And we are a blessed people.

But giving thanks is something that I believe we should do every day. Think about it - if you're anything like me you probably have a long list of things to be thankful for. Looking out my office door to the dining room I see my wonderful kids, my wife and my crazy dog. For all the health issues that our family faces I am thankful that we are alive and kicking. I have faith that all that we face will work out in the end.

I'm thankful for my job. It's not perfect but it fits my life right now. I'm thankful for my family and friends. I'm thankful for a country that is blessed with people who only want to make it a better place to live. I'm thankful for the men and women who willfully go in harms way to make the world a better place.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

P.S. - If you're looking for a easy way to say thanks to the men and women of the Armed Forces Xerox is sponsoring the Lets Say Thanks program. Please take a minute out of your life and spread the love.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Teenager Daughter Owner's Manual

(making the rounds at work)

Teenager Daughter Owner's Manual

Instructions for all those with teenage daughters or daughters who think they are teenagers or who will eventually be teenagers.

Congratulations! You are now the proud new owner of a teenaged daughter. Please read this manual carefully, as it describes the maintenance of your new daughter, and answers important questions about your warranty (which does NOT include the right to return the product to the factory for a full refund).

IF YOU FEEL YOU HAVE RECEIVED YOUR TEENAGER IN ERROR:

To determine whether you were supposed to receive a teenaged girl, please examine your new daughter carefully.

Does she:

  1. look very similar to your original daughter, only with more makeup and less clothing?
  2. refuse to acknowledge your existence on the planet Earth(except when requesting money)?
  3. Sleep in a burrow of dirty laundry?

If any of these are true, you have received the correct item.

BREAK-IN PERIOD

When you first receive your teenaged daughter, you will initially experience a high level of discomfort. Gradually, this discomfort will subside, and you will merely feel traumatized. This is the "Break-In Period," during which you are becoming accustomed to certain behaviors that will cause you concern, anxiety, and stress.
Once you have adapted to these behaviors, your teenager will start acting even worse.

ACTIVATION

To activate your teenaged daughter, simply place her in the vicinity of a telephone or Instant Messenger. No further programming is required.

SHUTDOWN

Several hours after activation, you may desire to shut down your teenaged daughter. There is no way to do this.

CLEANING YOUR TEENAGED DAUGHTER

Having a teenaged daughter means learning the difference between the words "clean" and "neat." Teenaged daughters are very clean, because they take frequent showers that last more than an hour. They will scrub themselves with expensive, fragrant soaps which you must purchase for them because like I'm sure I'm going to use like the same kind of soap my mom and dad use. When they have completely drained the hot-water tank, they will step out and wrap themselves in every towel in the bathroom, which they will subsequently strew throughout the house. If you ask them to pick up the towels, you are confusing "clean" with "neat." Teenagers are very busy and do not have time to be neat. They expect others to pick up after them. These others are called "parents."

FEEDING YOUR TEENAGED DAUGHTER

Your teenaged daughter requires regular meals, which must be purchased for her at restaurants because she detests everything you eat because it is like so disgusting.

She does not want you to accompany her to these restaurants, because some people might see you and, "like I'm sure I want my friends to see me eating dinner with my parents". Either order take-out food or just give her the money, preferably both. If you order pizza, never answer the doorbell because the delivery boy might see you and, "ohmigod he is so hot!" Yes, your daughter's idea of an attractive man is the pizza boy.

CLOTHING YOUR TEENAGED DAUGHTER

Retailers make millions of dollars a year selling stylish and frankly sensible clothing which will look adorable on your daughter. If you enjoy shopping, you will love the vast selections which are available to you. Unfortunately, your teenaged daughter wants to dress like a lap dancer. You may be able to coerce her into putting on a cute outfit before leaving the house, but by the time she walks in the schoolhouse door, she will be wearing something entirely different.

OTHER MAINTENANCE

Teenaged daughters require one of two levels of maintenance:

"High," and "Ultra High".

Your daughter is "Ultra High." This means that whatever you do won't be enough and whatever you try won't work.

WARRANTY

This product is not without defect because she has your genes, for heaven's sake. If you think this is not fair, talk to your parents, who think it is hilarious. Your teenaged daughter will remain a teenager for as long as it takes for her to become a woman, which in her opinion has already happened and as far as you are concerned never really will. If you are dissatisfied with your teenaged daughter, well, what did you expect? In any event, your warranty does not give you your little girl back under any circumstances, except that deep down she's actually still there--you just have to look for her.

Monday, November 19, 2007

Chuck

I'm really enjoying Chuck on Monday nights. The stories, while unbelievable, are fun and Adam Baldwin is just great. Tonight was one of those perfect exchanges between Chuck and John Casey (Baldwin) when Chuck was interrupted while brushing his teeth.

    Chuck Bartowski - Is there nothing sacred to you?

    John Casey - Just the right to keep and bear arms.


Delivered in the classic Adam Baldwin deadpan way.

Christmas Cards

When filling yours out please consider adding a couple of more:

    A Recovering Sailor or Marine
    National Naval Medical Center
    Marine Corps Liaison Center
    8901 Rockville Pike
    Bethesda, MD 20889-560T


or

    A Recovering American Soldier
    c/o Walter Reed Army Medical Center
    6900 Georgia Avenue NW
    Washington, DC 20307-5001


The word via Blackfive is that there is a need of Christmas cheer at both hospitals.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

National Ammo Day



Yea - another reason to buy ammo. Please do your part and support National Ammo Day.

Now where does the Exchange server plug in?

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Saving the world with AOL

24: The Unaired 1994 Pilot
Jack Bauer saves the world with AOL 3.0.



From collegehumor.com

Smile

Monday, November 12, 2007

What Is A Veteran?

What Is A Veteran

Some veterans bear visible signs of their service: a missing limb, a jagged scar, a certain look in the eye.

Others may carry the evidence inside them: a pin holding a bone together, a piece of shrapnel in the leg - or perhaps another sort of inner steel: the soul's ally forged in the refinery of adversity.

Except in parades, however, the men and women who have kept America safe wear no badge or emblem.

You can't tell a vet just by looking. What is a vet?

He is the cop on the beat who spent six months in Saudi Arabia sweating two gallons a day making sure the armored personnel carriers didn't run out of fuel.

He is the bar room loudmouth, dumber than five wooden planks, whose overgrown frat boy behavior is outweighed a hundred times in the cosmic scales by four hours of exquisite bravery near the 38th parallel.

She - or he - is the nurse who fought against futility and went to sleep sobbing every night for two solid years in Da Nang.

He is the POW who went away one person and came back another - or didn't come back AT ALL.

He is the Quantico drill instructor who has never seen combat - but has saved countless lives by turning slouchy, no-account rednecks and gang members into Marines, and teaching them to watch each other's backs.

He is the parade - riding Legionnaire who pins on his ribbons and medals with a prosthetic hand.

He is the career quartermaster who watches the ribbons and medals pass him by.

He is the three anonymous heroes in The Tomb Of The Unknowns, whose presence at the Arlington National Cemetery must forever preserve the memory of all the anonymous heroes whose valor dies unrecognized with them on the battlefield or in the ocean's sunless deep.

He is the old guy bagging groceries at the supermarket - palsied now and aggravating slow - who helped liberate a Nazi death camp and who wishes all day long that his wife were still alive to hold him when the nightmares come.

He is an ordinary and yet an extraordinary human being - a person who offered some of his life's most vital years in the service of his country, and who sacrificed his ambitions so others would not have to sacrifice theirs.

He is a soldier, and a savior, and a sword against the darkness, and he is nothing more than the finest, greatest testimony on behalf of the finest, the greatest nation ever known.

So remember, each time you see someone who has served our country, just lean over and say, "Thank You". That's all most people need, and in most cases it will mean more than any medals they could have been awarded or were awarded. Two little words that mean a lot, "THANK YOU."

author- Father Denis Edward O'Brien USMC

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Chase Daniels Live

Chase Daniels? Just who is he? To the thousands of people at Chicagoland Speedway back in July that were there for the Montgomery Gentry show on pole day they were the opening band who's lead singer didn't bother to give out the band's web site so any potential fans could find out where they were playing. The wife and some of the other MG fans that were there in July went back and forth after the show trying to remember the name of the opening band. After they figured it out and found the bands website we (well not so much me) made plans to go see him. And thats what we did last night.

We went to the Last Shot Bar and Grill in South Elgin, Illinois. Not to far from home so we went a little early to get a decent seat as the person on the phone said it was a small place.

Walking into a small bar when you're not a 'local' is a strange experience. Everyone looked at us as we walked in. The wife poked me and told me to go first. Cold beer solves everything :-) The barmaid told us where the band would set up so we kept moving seats as people left to get well positioned for the show.

After a while some guys showed up and started setting up. I asked one if he was with the band and it turned out to be Chase Daniels himself. He talked with us for quite a while. We got to meet his wife, other band members and the site webmaster. The wife told him about seeing him in July and he shared the story of the band coming out at Joliet and being shocked at the size of the crowd. Anyways he was a real nice guy as was everyone else we met. Well except the woman next to me decided that her rear end was supposed to be in my lap much of the evening...

Once the show started it was pretty enjoyable. A mix of covers and original songs. Some of the audio may be a little distorted as I was ~3 feet from one of the speakers.












And just because the drummer is a fan of #24 don't hold it against the band. #20 is our guy and we still enjoyed the show. In fact the wife has made plans to go see them again next year.



We left at the end of the second set. We were up way past our bedtime... Chase and his wife thanked us personally for coming. Real nice people. One of the guitarists and the webmaster did the same.

If Chase Daniels and Western Star are ever in your neck of the woods give them a listen.

Happy Veterans Day

Too many it's just another day. Another day to shop. Another day to advertise. To me it's a day to remember the sacrifice that a few have made for the sake of many. It's a day to remember my granddads, my dad, my brothers Rich and Bob, and my sister Cheryl. For serving in time of war and in time of peace. For taking time away from family and friends to serve their country. I stand in awe of you and your fellow veterans.


I'm incredibly happy to say that Google decided to (finally) create a special logo for Veterans day.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

See anything wrong?

We got our new refrigerator delivered today and magnet wars started soon after. A interesting grouping was noticed. Some may find it amusing.

No Better Friend, No Worse Enemy

Happy Birthday to the United States Marine Corp!

Sadly - Google choose not to create a special logo for today. I wonder if they will do anything for Veterans Day.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Chris Muir rocks!

I've said it before but Day By Day is one of the best cartoons out there. Today's strip is perfect.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Thanks and Praise


    Thanks and Praise: I photographed men and women, both Christians and Muslims, placing a cross atop the St. John’s Church in Baghdad. They had taken the cross from storage and a man washed it before carrying it up to the dome.


More about this event from the incredible Michael Yon.

May all God's people say Amen!

Congratulations Patti!

Microsoft and USO Announce Microsoft Above and Beyond Award Winners.

One of them should be familiar...

    Effort Award: Patti Patton-Bader, Pasadena, Calif. Soon after Patton-Bader began sending care packages to her son in Iraq, she started a group of volunteers to “adopt” soldiers. Since then, the group’s 100,000 members have sent tens of thousands of care packages and hundreds of thousands of letters to make sure no soldier is forgotten while serving. Its motto: “May no soldier go unloved.”


The group she founded? Soldiers Angels.

Don't forget - there is still time to get involved in the the annual fund raising drive for Project Valour-IT.

Monday, November 05, 2007

Happy Birthday to you!

Thing1. He's 22 today!

It seems like yesterday that we were sitting on the couch watching the Super Bowl bound Bears.

One more week

to donate to Project Valour-IT during the Veterans Day challenge. (Team Marines please) Don't wait till the last minute.

For a little extra incentive go check out Badger6's blog.

Saturday, November 03, 2007

Math 1950-2006

From my sister-in-law (a teacher with over 30 years of experience...)

Last week I purchased a burger at Burger King for $1.58. The counter girl took my $2 and I was digging fo r my change when I pulled 8 cents from my pocket and gave it to her. She stood there, holding the nickel and 3 pennies, while looking at the screen on her register. I sensed her discomfort and tried to tell her to just give me two quarters, but she hailed the manager for help. While he tried to explain the transaction to her, she stood there and cried.

Why do I tell you this?

Because of the evolution in teaching math since the 1950s:
  1. Teaching Math In 1950

    A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?

  2. Teaching Math In 1960

    A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?


  3. Teaching Math In 1970

    A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80. Did he make a profit?


  4. Teaching Math In 1980

    A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20.


  5. Teaching Math In 1990

    A logger cuts down a beautiful forest because he is selfish and inconsiderate and cares nothing for the habitat of animals or the preservation of our woodlands. He does this so he can make a profit of$20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down their homes? (There are no wrong answers )


  6. Teaching Math In 2006

    Un hachero vende una carretada de madera por $100. El costo de la producciones es $80. Cuanto dinero ha hecho?

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Real American Heroes

Not GI Joe but Sergeant Josh Morley, Specialist Tracy Willis, Specialist Chris Corriveau, and Specialist Eric Moser. Their story is one you won't read about in your local paper but deserves a few minutes of your time.

Jeff Emanuel has their story at The American Spectator

After reading consider a donation to Project Valour-IT